1. Say out your fears
It’s what makes you a human being. Everybody has fears, everybody is afraid of something. It means you trust them with your fears and that may go a long way.
She may bring her fears up as well, or that would be coming up soon or later. Remember, it is not about you, it is always about her/him.
2. Say out your troubles (past and present)
This is like #1 about fears. It’s all about building trust and being more of a human. Always showing that you, as everyone else, sometimes can be bruised by life’s circumstances.
Saying that you don’t always fend off problems, they (circumstances) get the best of you. That may cause him to come out – creating a strong bond and an open air environment. That’s we want after all.
3. Try not to cover your weakness too much (be human enough)
Have you ever related with someone who always seemed to have all together? I have. And you know how I felt deep down inside me? I just felt that I didn’t know her well. I kept covering stuff and avoiding things that would expose my flaws…..I could start showing some but it felt risky.
Being closed, closes doors for genuine and real intimacy. I really don’t anyone who wants a great relationship but doesn’t want genuine and real intimacy. Do you? I don’t think so.
Just give them the purity of your attention. They, generally, get to feel important and that may also boost their confidence at the same time earning you a great deal of respect.
It twist things to in your favour more when you tend to converse and do things that reflect on what you were told, part of previous conversations and stuff.
Besides, who wants to talk to somebody who doesn’t listen . . . personally, I feel like I am just making noise or I am bluffing and that just gets me off my motivation to be any good to the one I am talking to.
Let them know you see the good in them. It makes them feel that they worth loving or being related to. It multiplies self-worth and self-esteem.
People with low self-worthy tend to be a burden. Remember, always do, that it’s about them, NOT YOU pal.
6. Reminisce and create memories together
7. Do not judge but encourage
8. Tell your victories
Talk about the things that have made you feel great in life, even those things that many people wouldn’t consider worth mentioning among the victories. I sometimes talk about the first time I scored in a community soccer match, and my first correct answer at school in grade 1. It’s a bit silly and trivial but hey, who laid rules about this? If there are any, then too bad.
9. Let out your standards
Be honest about what you expect from her – behaviour, conduct, and other important stuff.
It would go an extra mile if you let her know what you call best when it comes to your work and the last time you had it… it could be that great you give them an exhibit of such standards (that is about work not about what you expect from her, coz that just hurts and causes a sense of insecurity)